22/12/2016

SELF-DOUBT AND WHAT IFS

What if I never get rich?

What if I’m late?

What if it doesn’t play out the way I want it to?

Doubt is a feeling of uncertainty that can cause people to question what they may be about to do. It’s the moment of sheer panic where you realise that maybe things won’t go the way that you expect or hope. But that doesn’t mean things won’t work out. I myself always hope for the best and then end up focusing on the negatives.

Honestly it’s a bad habit, I’ve even done it in the beginning of this post!

I like spending time alone, it gives me time to reflect on things but those moments of solitude also leave time to overthink and overcomplicate things. There have been instances where I’ve ended looking at every possible worst case scenario right up until I end up having a breakdown, floods of tears included, usually along the lines of ‘what if I never succeed?’

I’ve got a bad habit of avoiding all the positive things like:

What if things go perfectly?

What if I’m just overreacting?

What if it works out just the way I want it to?

Genuinely, and it may even sound ‘sappy’ or cliché, but I believe in the power of positivity. Okay… so it’s taken me a while to get into this sort of vibe, and if you had been talking to me a few months ago I’d be on the verge of screaming or crying. Now I think I’ve developed some sort of calm demeanour which is pretty damn satisfying, but honestly,

I still ask a “what if?” question every now and again but then I ask myself “so what?” So what if it happens.

Personally I do think about the future but in the grand scheme of things it is equally important to think about what’s going on around you in the present moment. At the end of the day life is far too short to be constantly second guessing every decision you’ve ever made or the ones you’re yet to make.

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Well, hi there!

I’ve never been one for ‘about me’ pages so let's keep it short and sweet: I'm 25 (so I guess you could assume I'm going through a quarter-life crisis), London-based, love food, oh, and partial to a rum-based drink... or just the rum tbh.